I recall hearing a recording of my voice as a child, maybe 7 or so. There was this deep voice coming from a small body. Watching this video planted the seed of insecurity in my voice. The lies I told myself grew over the years, “you talk too much” ; “you don't sound like a woman” ; and thinking maybe it will change over time.
This seed was fertilized throughout various seasons by me alone. I began to make statements around others about my lack of confidence which gave them confidence to join the attack I made on myself. Over the years this seed inflated to the point I would remain quiet whenever possible. I refused to leave anyone a voicemail because when I played it back it made me cringe.
Well, one day a boy around 10 years old gave me a card during his final therapy session. Upon opening the card I fought back tears. Brightly colored with bold lettering read, You Have A Powerful Voice. At that moment the impact of my voice became a bit clearer. I was chosen to have this voice as the rooms I will enter require for me to grab the attention of people who would prefer to ignore me. The card hangs on my wall as a constant reminder to not plant the seeds of destruction again.
-Dr. K